Monday, December 19, 2011

Stitching the Pieces


Dreams flourish. Dreams grow. Dreams happen. Dreams die.

Everyone knows what a dream is, but can’t explain it. Dreams sound like plants. Dreams can be compared to balloons holding our thoughts and waiting to explode. Dreams sound human. Dreams are human and are the closest thing to being human. They are things that makes us, us.

I have dreams just like you. That’s why this blog was created. That’s why this is being written. I have suffered many tragedies in my life since I was born and many these past few months, but who hasn’t. What makes my story different? What makes me so different or so special? These endless questions have always bothered me to the point of sleepless nights and waking nightmares.

I had the dream to be a writer. I still do. But, I haven’t written anything in a while and I’m being honest. You, dear reader, probably noticed that these posts became less and less frequent. I began looking at writing less as fun and more as a task. I rushed into the chaos of college life dealing with problems in school, family, friends, finances, etc. And writing used to be my escape from my problems, but back then I viewed it just as another thing added to the list and it was taking too much of my time.

I’m trying to stitch everything back together in my life, but it is difficult when there are this many broken pieces, in so many different places. It feels like I’m trying to put back together three different puzzles that are all in the same pile. I’ve changed and have gained more responsibilities also, but that won’t deter me away this time. There are more people in my life, more that have distanced themselves, and I will tell you about them. The real and fictional.

Now, where did my writing go?

Did my dreams of becoming a writer die? Did my dreams get lost among all the crap being thrown at me? Are they gone forever?

No.

I’m writing again. I’m writing this.

But the most important thing is: I’m trying again. Looking for “it” again. Please bare with me. You’ve been here for a while and the fact that you’re reading this brings me great joy. I’m going to start writing again. Let me to tell you my story and the story of a few others, because I’ve left you in the dark for some time and I’m sorry for that. I’ve brought a new light and an old dream. Lend me your ears.

I have to tell you about this blank year on the blog and all that’s gone on. Welcome to the Student Writer’s Mind, again.

3 comments:

Julie Geistfeld said...

Life is a place where we have many 'dreams' - expectations if you will. Everything tells us to expect things from life. Yet, it never works out the way we expect, does it?
Maybe that's why we write? In that world, for that brief moment it comes together in ways that life never feels like it does.

Wishing you direction, peace, and 'it' (aka the place where joy resides) in 2012.

Vatche said...

Thank you, Julie! I really appreciate that you left a comment here. It's good to see you and the rest of the readers, as well! :D

Life is a place that is full of magical things and dastardly things. I've hit many highs and lows and usually I don't expect any of them, but that's what makes life livable, right?

As for the New Year, I wish you the best and only the best! Have a great one!

Tsionah N said...

I'm really glad to see this post. I can't tell you how many times I have had to take a moment to ask myself the reason I write.

And sometimes it takes writing continual "bad" material before I hit my breakthrough. I think that my blog is a good mirror of that haha!

Good luck! I'm excited to see some new things from you. I am sure it will be amazing.

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